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The End of my Addiction

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Good morning everyone. I hope you all had a nice weekend, and for those in the US, a nice long weekend. I got at least two of the three days off (although I only have to go in for a few hours today).

Hi all, I'm back from Europe/Britain.   Had a great time with Dad. Made me happy to see him so happy. Was in London during Brexit vote, with old family friends who voted Leave. Was

I picture myself driving along with a car full of balloons blown up by sober people.

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Yes,that's it.

Theres no message boards as such but if you follow the alcohol side of if you get notifications of new threads and you need to follow that one and you then get a notification of new posts on that post.Sounds complicated but it's not haha.

I do everything on my phone can check for new notifications wherever I am.

 

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StuckinLA

I can't break myself away from the horrorshow that is the democratic convention long enough to post. Also my girl wants to have a talk about our relationship. Also I drank yesterday and the day before. These all might be related, might not.

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Yeah,what is going on with your country stuck?

Actually,what is going in my country/Europe......the worlds going mad!

Hope things work out with your girlfriend x

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Baclofenman

Well a fairly shitty day draws to a close:

Firstly the weather appears to have taken a turn, woke up to rain, my mood did not improve when i got in my car at 07.00am to find I had left the car window open and had a damp seat

Then, one of my work projects has gone Pete Tong

Then when i thought it could not get any worse,my 80 year old Mum called to say, while she and the old man were out, some scroates had burgled their house - I feel a bit bad as I should have gone round to stay but she said the cops were coming round to do the science stuff and I would just get in the way - It really makes me fucking sick that some people think they can break into the houses of people (in their 80's), who have worked their bollocks off for 50 years and steal the stuff they have worked so hard for and saved for - A one way trip to Epping forest and a shallow grave would be my punishment for them

On the up side, the weather is supposed to improve and I only used a small amount of tissues during LLF - As an adopted child, maybe I feel it a little bit more than others but if you are in the UK, you gotta watch it 

Still it could be worse, I could be drunk in a ditch somewhere

Regards

 

Bacman

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Oh, Bacman, I am so, so sorry about your parents. That's unbelievable! At least they're okay. And yes, it's a great thing that you're sober and able to deal with the situation. 

I really hope tomorrow is better. :hug: 

We're going to have to have a discussion about your English. It doesn't make sense. I need a dictionary of Britishisms. Pete Tong? Scroates, I can figure out. I hope it's a really bad word, though. 

19 hours ago, Nicnak said:

Yeah,what is going on with your country stuck?

Please for the love of all good things, do not ask that question. In fact, can we have a moratorium on anything having to do with politics until after November 7th (election day in the US)? I can't take it. Really. It's SO HARD TO WATCH all this stuff. (Actually, I don't watch it live. I can't do it. It would make me want to drink. I do keep up by listening to reliable news after the fact.) 

Stuck, hang in there brother and get back on the bus. Or wagon. Whatever. I need a partner on this roller coaster. (If I was feeling creative I'd throw a bunch more metaphors in there, just to be annoying. Metaphors, right?) 

I actually turned what should have been a really shitty day into something productive. And you know what? Some sort of switch happened in my brain and I can't wait to take this exam and spent all day studying. WOOHOOOO! :) I hope it lasts. You know what else? It's really, really nice to be completely AF tonight. I can't wait to get up in the morning and bustamove with the pooch before I sit down and get some solid studying done. God I hope this feeling lasts. (Prior to today, I have really been feeling as though I will neva eva get a grip on all this info, and even started thinking about waiting tables or something. Not that I could ever do that again. I hate people too much. Not really. But if you're going to deal with people that much, it's best to do it slightly drunk. Hmmmm. I'm gonna make such a great nurse. :-/ )

See you guys on the flip side. 

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Baclofenman

Thanks Girls

Pete Tong = Wrong - Its all gone Pete Tong

Scroate = A horrible C*nt

I am going round to see them today - Gives you a really sick feeling inside

And yes, Ne - I did not realise until you mentioned it, at no time did I revert to my "default" and scoot a bottle of wine down my neck - In fact, it did not cross my mind :)

Politics - Ah, Political views are like arse holes - Everyone has got one - There are stories of families being irreparably pulled apart because of the Br-exit vote

Regards

 

Bacman

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That happened in my family but it was religion. 25 years later and the hurt feelings are mostly mended, but it was terrible for my mom and her siblings for a long time when one of them found religion. 

For the very first time since we opened this forum, it's actually quiet as a church on Monday in here. I suppose it had to happen eventually, but I do not like it at all. 

I got up late again today, and it was already sizzling hot outside, so Pete the Pup and I just did a short walk. She's becoming such a good dog now that she's getting enough exercise. Which is really important because I think I'm going to try to make a trip to California to visit my brother in October for Ed's birthday. If we do that, my parents will have to take care of Pete. (She's too much work for our normal dog-sitter, who is really out of shape and couldn't really take care of her. He did it once and said, "Call me again when she's 10.")

I was going to surprise Ed with the trip, but I had to tell him because the spare tickets are in each of our names and he has to make his own reservations. I told him about it last night. He's all bent out of shape with me right now. Again. And I really can't be bothered to unruffle his feathers when I'm feeling so positive about stuff. His response to the trip was, "Maybe. Visiting your brother is not actually a surprise or something I'm particularly excited about." pffffft. My brother lives in San Francisco, one of the coolest cities in the country. (IMHO) The plane tickets are free (long story about getting stuck in an airport for 3 days last years). My brother always makes our visits ispecial with tickets to cool things, often VIP, and special events with his kids. 

I know I should give him some space to be angry and out of sorts, since he's not drinking and not smoking, so surely going through withdrawals. But man. It's annoying. Once again he's not taking any responsibility for himself or his feelings. *sigh*

Hope it's a good day, folks! 

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Baclofenman
7 minutes ago, Ne1 said:

That happened in my family but it was religion. 25 years later and the hurt feelings are mostly mended, but it was terrible for my mom and her siblings for a long time when one of them found religion. 

Oh God - Please....Politics are a definite go, compared with that 

10 minutes ago, Ne1 said:

I got up late again today

Oh - Makes a change :)

10 minutes ago, Ne1 said:

"Maybe. Visiting your brother is not actually a surprise or something I'm particularly excited about." pffffft.

I was thinking, What an ungrateful sod...

But then I thought of "What if The Pianna booked me a birthday trip to see her brother?" - No, he has a point ;)

26 minutes ago, Ne1 said:

Once again he's not taking any responsibility for himself or his feelings. *sigh*

He is a man Ne, 'nuff said

Regards

 

Bacman

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21 minutes ago, Baclofenman said:

I was thinking, What an ungrateful sod...

But then I thought of "What if The Pianna booked me a birthday trip to see her brother?" - No, he has a point ;)

Lol. Visiting my brother can be draining for sure. They have 3 kids, the oldest one is 13 and is no longer interested in adults, unless it's to annoy us by tormenting his little brother. Those with kids cannot begin to understand how overwhelming they are for people who are used to a silent house and reasonable, uninterrupted discussions. My sister-in-law is unable to sit still. If the kids are not doing something constructive, then there are bike rides or hikes or jogging or on and on and on. She's one of those annoying super-fit California moms. Northern California, y'all. So hippy-ish. Not SoCal! No fake boobs or spray-on-tans. Lots of healthy, organic, vegetarian, outdoor stuff. I can't lie, she can also be a little overwhelming.  

So yeah, I guess you (and he) have a point. On the other hand, the tickets are free, the accommodations are pretty luxurious (despite the noise!) and we can spend days in the city or take a road trip...

 

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Baclofenman
35 minutes ago, Ne1 said:

 fake boobs

Where....where...., what did I miss......:ph34r:

Good thinking, sell it as the base for your adventure?

Mmm - Elephant up the stairs, me thinks

Regards

 

Bacman

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20 minutes ago, Baclofenman said:

Mmm - Elephant up the stairs, me thinks

*sigh* 

"Doing something very hard." http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=pushing an elephant up the stairs

I like that one, Bacman. It's a week away! And though I hate to admit this, because it's not the right time or place, wine country is there. Last time we went, we were solidly indifferent, though.  Now? Not so much. And I don't want to go someplace that undermines that goal, even if we've reached indifference by then. It'll be too soon. 

The more I think about it, the more reluctant I am to book the vacation. Not just because of the kids, and wine country, either. As I mentioned, my SIL is super-fit and super-together and they are super-rich. I will feel very self conscious, I think. Not a good place for me to be...

So we'll see. I'll table it for the moment and decide when I have a better idea of what the goal is before we buy the tickets. Thanks!

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Lostinspace

Hello everyone. Sorry I haven’t been around in ages. I’ve been hiding from the world and from my sh*tty reality in a haze of pot smoke (although that just ended because I now need to clear my system out ASAP). Anyway, the worst happened. I made a huge mistake at work and reacted very poorly when questioned about it. I was worried to death about it for a couple weeks until our followup meeting (hence the getting lost in smoke), then on Wednesday I was laid off. They’re allowing me to continue working there for another four weeks while I look for another job. I appreciate that they’re doing that, but finding a job in a month is pretty much impossible. It took me many months to find this one when I was searching before. And I really don’t want to go anywhere else. I really like this job. I can’t believe I f*cked it up so badly - all while 100% sober! Just goes to show that a sober mind can’t save you from stupidity if that’s what you were given to begin with. I’m trying to pick myself up and dust off my knees, but so far, every time I look at the help wanteds, or start to update my resume, I start sobbing uncontrollably. I feel gutted.

I’m leaving in less than an hour for a three-day family reunion. Not sure if this will be a good distraction to get my mind off things so I can come back refreshed and ready to tackle the job search, or if it’ll make it that much harder to deal with the burden, having to pretend to be happy and having a good time when I’m really dying inside. Guess I’ll find out soon enough.

Stuck - I’m sending many positive wishes and strength your way that you can work things through with your girl. Have you come any closer to deciding on trying bac again (in combination with gabapentin, of course)? Hang in there. There is a way out so long as you keep trying.

Bacman - I’m so sorry some a$sh*le did that to your parents. Burglarizing anyone’s house is nasty business, but targeting the elderly is downright despicable. I’m glad your parents are otherwise OK, but what a terrible ordeal!

Anyway, I’ll be away for the next few days, so I hope you all have a nice weekend, and I’ll check back in next week.

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Oh, no! I'm so sorry Lis. I'll give you a pep talk next week. I started to do it today, but it's too soon, I think. 

You are not stupid. Stop. 

Hope the reunion is fun and that if you do feel really awful you can find someone(s) to share it with so you're not just carrying it around all by yourself. 

I'm glad you shared it here. I'll be thinking of you and sending good thoughts your way. :hug: 

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Baclofenman

Yeah - Bummer LIS - I cant help thinking it is odd they want you gone, yet let you work a month? - Not sure about over there but in the UK there is a "procedure" an employer has to go through to sack someone and it definitely means instant termination when this criteria is met

Thanks for you kind words about my parents - Fortunately my Dad had locked all the goodies away and they could not find them, so they lost a few bits and bobs, mainly worthless but none the less some of enormous sentimental value

On a different tack about despicable people, 70 individuals have been arrested over indecent images of children being found on their computers - The oldest is 90 and the youngest, just 14 WTF - Oh yes, they were just doing research!!

Vile individuals

Regards

 

Bacman

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It's not unheard of, bacman, that an employer would give some time to the employee. It helps the employer make the transition, assuming the employee isn't going to sabotage anything. Sometimes the employee will even train the replacement! 

Glad the crooks didn't get anything of real value. Hard to lose stuff you're bonded too, though. 

And yeah, there're bad guys everywhere. Except here. :)

 

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Molly78

Not been posting much recently as I had a glitch on my laptop - every time I wanted to go back a page it gave me a blank screen! I was about to ask admin to look into it, but it seems to have sorted itself.

Bacman, sorry to hear about the burglary. Always seems much worse when it's elderly people somehow. They are so much more vulnerable. I live alone & am out at work for 2-3 days a week, so have a very expensive alarm system (ADT), but sometimes it's more trouble than it's worth - the number of false alarms is irritating. And if they can't contact me they phone everyone on the list of contacts they asked me for when it was installed. And sometimes it's only because they "lost signal contact" (whatever that means), a technical issue which is THEIR FAULT! I just hope that its presence has mainly put off a potential intruder or two? But how would I know?

LIS, you have my sympathy about your job. But when one door closes, another opens......apologies if that sounds glib, especially when you say you had such difficulty getting this job.

Well I started a week's annual leave on Thursday - the day the heavens finally opened after 2 weeks of glorious weather in the UK. There hasn't been much sun since then. I am well pissed off.

I try to take a week in August so I can do stuff with my 3 oldest grandsons (aged 11, 9 & 7) who are all at school. This year i discover that they no longer want to spend time at my house because i don't have the right stuff. I have a laptop & an ipad, but not an MP3 player. I have Netflix & Amazon Prime, but not the vast selection of DVDs they have at their house, & sod's law says the ones they want to watch aren't available to watch free. I have an acre & a half of land where they could camp & make dens - but "that's boring!" They are mainly indoor creatures, though could all do with more exercise as they are verging on overweight. I know there comes a time when kids stop wanting to spend time with grandparents, I just wasn't counting on it happening so soon! Oh well, I still have 3 younger ones aged 5, 3 & 2. Maybe they will still honour me with their company for a bit longer!

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22 minutes ago, Molly78 said:

Not been posting much recently as I had a glitch on my laptop - every time I wanted to go back a page it gave me a blank screen! I was about to ask admin to look into it, but it seems to have sorted itself.

I've had that problem too on this site. When I try to go a page back from the page I'm on, I'll get a blank page that says "xxx days alcohol free" at the top. I have found that it usually works if I refresh the webpage. @Admin1?

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1 hour ago, Felina said:

I've had that problem too on this site. When I try to go a page back from the page I'm on, I'll get a blank page that says "xxx days alcohol free" at the top. I have found that it usually works if I refresh the webpage. @Admin1?

Oops,

Should be sorted. Iffy script.

Appols.

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StuckinLA

Oh Lis, sweetie, I am so so sorry. I don't know what to say, that job was perfect for you but you will find something new. 

And Bacman, sorry to hear about your parents and what they are going through. Losing sentimental belongings (to me) is worse than losing money. Take the damned TV, leave my postcards from Europe, that sort of thing.

As for me, the girl and I went out to dinner on Wednesday, as planned. After I bought her dinner we went to sit in a park downtown, where she broke up with me. For real, for good. It hurts not being able to text her during the day. I have not been sober since Monday, and have not written a freaking word. Another week down the drain, another week of lost time and opportunity to work on things that I say I value. 

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Lis,life can be shit at times but I know things are never as bleak a few months down the line 

bacman,I don't have parents alive but I know you probably want to rip the heads off the scroats that did this 

And stuck,what can I say.Just hang in there.

Molly,6 grandchildren,wow!

It will be quite a few years till I have some as my boys are 17 and 20 but my eldest wants a house by the time he's 23 and he wants kids fairly young.He has a girlfriend of 2 years and they are very close so who knows

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Jetsman32

I've never commented on this thread- I hope it isn't private or anything. If it is feel free to kick me out. I saw a side bar of LIS comment and thought I might be able to provide some assistance. 

Hey @Lostinspace very sorry to hear about your situation- that is horrible. The bright side is they are classifying your termination as a lay-off which means you will qualify for unemployment (depending on the wording on your separation letter). I wanted to mention this, and not how sure how personal you'd like to stay, but I work in HR/Talent Acquisition and I'd be happy to give your resume a once over if you'd like. I'm also very familiar with unemployment law in some states. The nice things is that I work for of the largest human capital companies in the industry so I could provide some guidance of finding the right jobs and identifying the right person to contact to get ahead of the pack. If you are interested feel free to message me me anytime.

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Hi everyone -

Sorry I've been AWOL for a week - I was in a weeklong course learning how to trade financial markets - and it ended so-so. I took it back in March and had to drop out bcs of a family emergency that quickly led to me hitting the bottle, then again in June which hit the skids because the building's internet went out, and so this was the THIRD time, and I finished and got my little certificate but the instructor presented the material in kind of a weird way, so I dunno, I may take it a fourth time. Luckily they have unlimited free re-takes. *sigh*. Next week I have jury duty at the Federal courthouse and I really hope I don't get put on a jury - but either way I might be AWOL for another week or so.

But I've read all the posts and my heart goes out to everyone especially @Baclofenman, @StuckinLA, and @Lostinspace. I also had my heart wounded a little bit - I finally reached out to the love of my life, and didn't hear back. Granted it was just a Facebook friend request, but he must have clicked "ignore" or something because the option to friend him isn't there any more. But I can still message him, and in a few weeks I'll muster up the courage. Even if I get a "no" that's fine, it's better than spending the rest of my life with the regret of never having tried.

@Lostinspace - I hope the family reunion goes well, if I were you it would go terribly - I wear my emotions on my sleeves but I'm also the ruthlessly independent type, and when people around me start asking "what's wrong?", "are you OK?" etc it just makes it exponentially worse. Hopefully you're better at communicating and "people skills" than I am :-). When you come back, and if you have some time, like an evening free without a demanding workday ahead, I think you'd be an excellent candidate for a Dextromethorphan trip. Sorry if mentioning that isn't kosher. Feel free to message me about it.

Anyway hugs and best wishes to you all,

Chuck

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